By Richard Trionfo on 2011-11-21 23:04:50

We are live from Hershey, Pennsylvania and your announcers are Michael ‘#Silenceisgolden’ Cole, Jerry ‘#DoesKellyRneedanewcohost’ Lawler, and Booker ‘#DidYouSeeThat’ T.

CM Punk makes his way to the ring with the WWE Championship Title around his waist.

Punk has a story for everyone to start things off. He reminders sitting in Miss Worth’s first grade class and she wanted everyone to say what they wanted to be when they grew up. Some said that they wanted to be astronauts and policemen. One student said they wanted to be ‘teen wolf’. Punk says that he wanted to be a professional wrestler. Punk says that he didn’t want to be a sports entertainer. Punk says that as a wrestler who worked his way from the bottom to the top of the WWE, he says that it was a big, gigantic, special deal to walk into Madison Square Garden and win the WWE Championship. The most satisfying reason is because he did it on his own terms. He never wanted to be an astronaut or a policeman. It might have been cool to do it as Teen Wolf, but he did it as himself.

The game of hot potato with the title is over because it is on the shoulder of the best in the world and it is going to stay there.

Punk says that some people in high places don’t like it, but he is the new face of WWE. Punk takes a seat in the middle of the ring. He told former Champion Alberto Del Rio that he is going to make the title interesting. He is going to bring some danger to the title and be an agent of change.

Punk says that he wants to know where the WWE Ice Cream bars are. Punk says that he would also like to change the title ‘interim General Manager John Laurinaitis’ and make it ‘former’.

Before he can be fired, John Laurinaitis makes his presence known. He says that Punk is supposebly the rabble rouser but he doesn’t think they should be on opposite sides because they both want is best for the WWE Universe. John says that he is going to take the high road and doesn’t know why Punk has an issue with him.

Punk says that he couldn’t hear what John said because of the crowd. Punk says that Mr. McMahon is a greedy, money grubbing, soulless bastard. Punk calls John Bill Lumbergh without the sense of humor. Punk says that John would smile to his face but undermine him. Punk says that they are not a Universe, they are fan. Punk says that John says it because it is a buzzword that the bosses want to be. Punk says John is a poor example of a middle management douchebag stooge.

John says that he is upper management. Just because he doesn’t have tattoos or piercings all over his body, he has a wild side and can be as creative and dynamic as Punk.

John says that Alberto has a rematch and that match is not going to wait until the next pay per view. It is going to happen next week.

Punk calls John an agent of change and then he suggests that they have the match now.

John says that he already has plans for tonight. John says that if you put yourself in the audience’s shoes, you can never go wrong. Punk will face Dolph Ziggler in a #ChampionVsChampion match.

Punk calls that decision stupid. It is not because he is afraid of Dolph Ziggler, it is because John doesn’t listen to the WWE Universe. They don’t want Dolph Ziggler versus CM Punk. . . They want Dolph Ziggler versus Zack Ryder.

John says that Zack will be wrestling Alberto Del Rio tonight. John says that Zack couldn’t beat Dolph and neither could Punk.

Punk says that he will beat Dolph Ziggler and next week, he will beat Alberto Del Rio as he walks up the ramp and we see the Twitter Trending Box. Punk says that someone is going to beat some sense into John.

John goes to his phone to trend things.

We go to footage from after Survivor Series when Rock talked about Zack Ryder.

Zack Ryder interrupts the introduction for Alberto Del Rio by Ricardo Rodriguez.

Match Number One: Zack Ryder versus Alberto Del Rio

Del Rio with punches and the referee stops Del Rio. Del Rio with a kick and then he goes for a single arm breaker and he gets a near fall. Del Rio with an arm bar. Del Rio with punches to the arm after Ryder gets in a punch on Del Rio. Ryder punches Del Rio and we see a Twitter Box update. Del Rio misses a punch from the turnbuckles and Ryder with clotheslines and a flapjack.

Del Rio with an Irish whip but he runs into Ryder’s knees and Ryder with a running boot into the corner. Ryder sets for the Rough Ryder but Ricardo warns Del Rio and Del Rio sends Ryder into the turnbuckles and then he hits a step up enzuigiri and then Del Rio floats over into the cross arm breaker and Ryder #tapsout.

Winner: Alberto Del Rio